George Muller on Faith

"I was growing in the faith and knowledge of Jesus, but I still preferred reading religious books instead of the scriptures." -George Muller

This is something I also struggle immensely with. I'll tell myself, oh it's ok, these people know a lot about God and God showed them great things. It's not that I can't learn something from them, it's that I'm going to a secondhand source instead of the first. Why wouldn't I want to go to the very word of God? The answer is faith. I have faith that God is real. I have some faith that God will speak to me and lead me to great things. But how much faith do I have that He will deliver my sisters? Or heal my sickness? Or even use me to bring people to Jesus? I try my hardest to not worry about these things and just grow in God. Give God the glory. I try and try so much I feel that I strive to gain His love. I try to be better than everyone else not in actions but in my stories I tell. (That's where lies come from.)

When I was younger, I would lie about everything. I can't imagine how my friends even wanted to be around me. How it killed my mom everyday how I made up stories of my teachers beating me and the monsters that set the preschool on fire. That's how young I was! Preschool!

I would like to grow in faith and believe that God will answer my prayers. When I ask to be stretched He stretches me and when I ask to be filled He fills me. Now I will ask Him to build more faith in me and He will help me build it. I have to allow Him and invite Him to do these things in me. I have to open the doors in me instead of shutting Him out.